My Journal and Diary
2006
July
Monday, July 17th, 2006
Time Has It's Way - A Copy From an Old Anonymous Blog
Interesting-- not sure I'm where I thought I'd be back in May, when I wrote that last post. I've been going through this long process of review, and I'm still kind of scared.
It certainly hasn't been fair. But I can't fall into the trap of seeking justice for myself. My job is to seek justice for others-- and I need to let God seek my justice. So I try to keep the head-shaking down to a minimum. But I echo the sentiments of my friends who say they don't understand.
At times it feels like the powers want me 'outta there.' I'm playing around with that idea, but can't decide for sure. At other times, I think they just want to work with me and not have to deal with my bull-shit. And I can't blame them. I'm not an easy guy to live with. That's why I married a strong Russian girl -- who can hold her own! I'm strong minded, dammit, and can be a little pushy.
God, I think you're calling me away. Please open and close all the right doors, cause I'm just a rat in this maze, and there's no cheese smell guiding me on.